Damien Hirst

A Damien Hirst assistant gets stuck in a butterfly painting and dies. Hirst wants to commemorate him by cutting him up and putting him in a glass tank.

First published in The Guardian 3rd Aug 2011

First published in The Guardian, 10 July, 2013

I was walking down the street the other day and Damien Hirst happened to be walking the other way. We passed. Not a thing! He acted as if he didn’t know me. I couldn’t believe it. So I decided to get my own back with this cartoon. How does it feel eh? Not too good. No, not too good at all.

The Japanese artist Yayoi Kusama and Damien Hirst did indeed have retrospectives at the same time in Tate Modern, as I have chronicled before in the only 2-parter cartoon I have yet done, here and here. I’m not sure about the rest of the world but in England Damien Hirst and Tracey Emin are very big news and get loads of mainstream press coverage, probably even more than that other favourite artist of the press, David Hockney. The idea that one affected not to have heard of the other tickled me. Oh, and in real life Damien Hirst actually does own Nick Serota. I once heard him howling from inside the Hirst mansion – he was late for his walk apparently. He must have been busting, poor thing.

In the year 4000 tourists in a gallery wonder why those ancient statues have so many pieces missing

First published in The Guardian 31 October 2012

Damien Hirst and Yayoi Kusama fall in love at Tate Modern over their mutual love of spots

First published in The Guardian 31 May 2012

Damien Hirst realises Yayoi Kusama is too much of a mono thinker and decides to break up with her. She doesn't take it well.

First published in The Guardian 6 June 2012

Damien Hirst gets a headache but has trouble getting rid of it.

First published in guardian.co.uk on 26th Oct 2011

The Art Doctor diagnoses nudes painted by Peter Paul Rubens, Lucian Freud, Francis Bacon and Damien Hirst

First published in guardian.co.uk on 31st Aug 2011

First published in The Guardian, 14 February, 2014

First published in The Guardian on 4 September, 2013